Marriage: A sweet companion

BY MFON OTTUK

Marriage is a sweet and unique companion instituted by God for a man and a woman to live together as husband and wife and produce children.

Generally, marriage is not a physical aspect of life, it has some spiritual attachments which explain its inception by the deity.  Example, from the genesis of this world, the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.”  Genesis 2:18.

Sociologists and psychologists agreed that, marriage is fundamental to every society and is easily the oldest institution in the history of mankind.  In its proper form, marriage is based on love and a unique desire for the parties to be together.

Our own Ibibio tradition in Akwa Ibom  State demands that the man who intended to take a wife should inform his parent of his plan (that is, if his parent do not choose a wife for him).  His parent would study the lady and her family to ensure that she is from a good parentage.

Meeting with the larger family would be later held to intimate others of the man’s intention.

On agreement, the man’s family would now go with some gins and gifts to the girl’s family where the intention of taking one of their daughters’ hand in marriage would be made known.  The girl’s family on their part, would also ask for time to consider the proposal.  They then inform their relatives about the new development and thus, proceeded with their own “fact finding exercise” in the man’s family.  As scheduled, both families met, the dowry discussed and paid.

After this, the ceremony commenced and the woman would be taken by her relatives to her husband’s house.  All of these acted as checks and balances on young people and society in general.

It is a taboo generally in Ibibio tradition for an unmarried couple to live together as husband and wife.  It was on this strength that a Lagos based indigene of Osuk Ediene, Prophet John Daniel Etim on the 4th of March, 2017, took his heartthrob, former miss Helen Sunday Akpan of Ndinya Mfia, both in Ikono Local Government Area of Akwa Ibom State in a colourful traditional marriage.  He underwent the above process before the actual ceremony which was like a carnival because of the crowd and quality of the event rating from the beautiful canopies, sitting arrangement, decoration, the band set, most especially, the mouth-watering foods – traditional cuisines (Udia Ebenge) displayed differently and shared accordingly to people satisfactorily.

The Master of Ceremony (MC) really added colour to the event with laughable jokes.  What a splendid marriage, it was well organized, full of fun.

What thrilled me most was the presentation of the bride and groom.  A large number of young men, all of them with walking sticks and women with different uniforms took over the whole arena.  The music used for the presentations was superb; the marriage was juicy and very successful.

While wishing John/Helen a happy and blissful married life, I want to also advise you to honour and respect your marital vows.  Congratulations!